I Cry Out For Help Within These Walls
Between These Blades Of Redness Falls
Submerged In Sadness And Drowned In Pain
I Slit My Wrist And Let It Rain
One Cut, Two Cut, Three Cut, Four
Late At Night I Cut Some More
I Lie Within This Bloody Gore
I'm Trying To Somehow Channel The Pain
And Release These Emotions Within Each Vein
It's An Addictive Disease, With a Bloody Scare
The Secret Hell Of Who You Are
Silently On The Bed I Ly
Weakening With Each Red Tear I Cry
I Really Don't Have A Choice
When a Bloody Blade Becomes My Voice
Saturday, October 29, 2011
On the Count of One
She sits in her room
Tired and alone
She's too scared to sleep
And too proud to let it be known
Hiding from reality
Afraid of what people will say
She'd rather just let it happen
And pray it will someday be okay
The night is coming fast
And her heart begins to race
She closes her eyes as he walks through the door
Never wanting to see his face
Yet again he takes her hands
And holds them tightly above her head
Takes advantage of the soul he's erased
Leaves her feeling dead
She deserves the abuse she gets
But she can't bare it anymore
He takes advantage of her lifeless body
Then calls her a stupid whore
He finally leaves her room
Not knowing it will be the final time
The girl decides to take her life
Put an end to her his crimes
She reaches under her bed
Places her hand upon a gun
She's scared but knows she'll soon be at peace
On the count of one...
Tired and alone
She's too scared to sleep
And too proud to let it be known
Hiding from reality
Afraid of what people will say
She'd rather just let it happen
And pray it will someday be okay
The night is coming fast
And her heart begins to race
She closes her eyes as he walks through the door
Never wanting to see his face
Yet again he takes her hands
And holds them tightly above her head
Takes advantage of the soul he's erased
Leaves her feeling dead
She deserves the abuse she gets
But she can't bare it anymore
He takes advantage of her lifeless body
Then calls her a stupid whore
He finally leaves her room
Not knowing it will be the final time
The girl decides to take her life
Put an end to her his crimes
She reaches under her bed
Places her hand upon a gun
She's scared but knows she'll soon be at peace
On the count of one...
Thursday, September 15, 2011
A Cold Night In December
It was another rainy day far back in December
A night I will not forget, a day I will remember
The tears were falling hard down from the sky
It was a day I won’t forget because I met a guy
He began talking to me looked like a nice friend
It was a day I won’t forget because it had no end
As I waited for the bus he put his coat around me
I wanted to speak but it was hard to hear or see
I was startled by his kindness, how his eyes were blue
I fell in love with him instantly, a thing I never knew
He had many interests, and to me he said them all
It was a day I won’t forget, the beginning of my fall
He lent me his phone number, and quickly I did agree
I wanted to know him, there was so much more to see
Many days went by and we talked a lot every day
I would meet him at the bus with many things to say
My parents wouldn’t like him for he was older than I
A fifteen year old seeing a Twenty-four year old guy…
But still it didn’t matter; we were in love for sure
We would meet every day, going back for more
One night I told my parents, that I was sleeping out
And they wanted to know what it was all about
I told them a friend was inviting me for the night
Hesitantly they agreed and I bid them all goodnight
He picked me up at the corner, in a big red car
I waited while he ran an errand and went into a bar
I waited for an hour or two, possibly even more
Suddenly I had a feeling someone was at the door
My heart was beating fast, I needed to run inside
Nothing was working right, so finally I cried
Suddenly something woke me from my upset state
He came in the car saying “So sorry that I was late”
I hugged him and he then kissed me on the cheek
Adrenaline flew through me, I became very weak
He then whispered in my ear “Baby lets have fun,
“I will tie you down, you won’t move till I’m done”
Fate was hitting me hard; I knew that it was wrong
I managed to squeak a “No!” but he was really strong
He tied me down and stripped off all of my clothes
I couldn’t believe that all this was right under my nose
Then the door opened, and two other men came in
“Finally you brought her, let this game begin”
I was confused and hurt, stuck in a huge mess
My love now turned into hate, I had to confess
“Please let me go home, I will never bother you again”
“Sorry babe we need you, remember we are friends?”
I screamed so loud it seemed as if the world was deaf
I cried my tears begging them, till there was nothing left
No body gave in to me, or even heard all of my cries
I couldn’t believe everything we were, all became lies
I couldn’t hear a thing, except their laughs of pleasure
A body once so innocent, and now they have my treasure
I don’t know what I was thinking, nothing made sense
I tried to remember all my classes to help in my defense
This all was my fault, as they were pushing me inside
And this poem will not measure how much I nearly cried
Finally they were finished, and they pushed me out the car
My legs were dripping blood, my arms had many scars
“Playing with you was fun; you fell for my good old trick”
Another one told me thank you for rubbing on his dick
I began to run really fast, for I just needed to get away
I thought of my parents and what they would really say
I fooled everyone in the game, especially my own self
Never thinking about others, or how they would have felt
I was selfish and stupid, fifteen, I couldn’t ever understand
All I needed right now was for someone to hold my hand
I fell on to the floor, without any notice of where I was
My body became limp and cold, my actions were the cause
It was a night I won’t forget, one I always will remember
The moment that changed my life, a cold night in December
So drown in all your sorrow
Let it wash the pain away
There is no other escape
You're alone
You're hurt
And no one will save you this time...
But... who would want to anyway?
A night I will not forget, a day I will remember
The tears were falling hard down from the sky
It was a day I won’t forget because I met a guy
He began talking to me looked like a nice friend
It was a day I won’t forget because it had no end
As I waited for the bus he put his coat around me
I wanted to speak but it was hard to hear or see
I was startled by his kindness, how his eyes were blue
I fell in love with him instantly, a thing I never knew
He had many interests, and to me he said them all
It was a day I won’t forget, the beginning of my fall
He lent me his phone number, and quickly I did agree
I wanted to know him, there was so much more to see
Many days went by and we talked a lot every day
I would meet him at the bus with many things to say
My parents wouldn’t like him for he was older than I
A fifteen year old seeing a Twenty-four year old guy…
But still it didn’t matter; we were in love for sure
We would meet every day, going back for more
One night I told my parents, that I was sleeping out
And they wanted to know what it was all about
I told them a friend was inviting me for the night
Hesitantly they agreed and I bid them all goodnight
He picked me up at the corner, in a big red car
I waited while he ran an errand and went into a bar
I waited for an hour or two, possibly even more
Suddenly I had a feeling someone was at the door
My heart was beating fast, I needed to run inside
Nothing was working right, so finally I cried
Suddenly something woke me from my upset state
He came in the car saying “So sorry that I was late”
I hugged him and he then kissed me on the cheek
Adrenaline flew through me, I became very weak
He then whispered in my ear “Baby lets have fun,
“I will tie you down, you won’t move till I’m done”
Fate was hitting me hard; I knew that it was wrong
I managed to squeak a “No!” but he was really strong
He tied me down and stripped off all of my clothes
I couldn’t believe that all this was right under my nose
Then the door opened, and two other men came in
“Finally you brought her, let this game begin”
I was confused and hurt, stuck in a huge mess
My love now turned into hate, I had to confess
“Please let me go home, I will never bother you again”
“Sorry babe we need you, remember we are friends?”
I screamed so loud it seemed as if the world was deaf
I cried my tears begging them, till there was nothing left
No body gave in to me, or even heard all of my cries
I couldn’t believe everything we were, all became lies
I couldn’t hear a thing, except their laughs of pleasure
A body once so innocent, and now they have my treasure
I don’t know what I was thinking, nothing made sense
I tried to remember all my classes to help in my defense
This all was my fault, as they were pushing me inside
And this poem will not measure how much I nearly cried
Finally they were finished, and they pushed me out the car
My legs were dripping blood, my arms had many scars
“Playing with you was fun; you fell for my good old trick”
Another one told me thank you for rubbing on his dick
I began to run really fast, for I just needed to get away
I thought of my parents and what they would really say
I fooled everyone in the game, especially my own self
Never thinking about others, or how they would have felt
I was selfish and stupid, fifteen, I couldn’t ever understand
All I needed right now was for someone to hold my hand
I fell on to the floor, without any notice of where I was
My body became limp and cold, my actions were the cause
It was a night I won’t forget, one I always will remember
The moment that changed my life, a cold night in December
So drown in all your sorrow
Let it wash the pain away
There is no other escape
You're alone
You're hurt
And no one will save you this time...
But... who would want to anyway?
The Broken Pretty Girl
Broken girl within her cries
Pretty girl on the outside lies
Broken girl within her dies
Pretty girl on the outside thrives.
Broken girl has so many fears
Pretty girl will never shed a tear
Broken girl has given up on life
Pretty girl gets through it without strife.
Broken girl her true persona
Pretty girl hides her in a coma
Broken girl needs to be revealed
Pretty girl will keep her sealed.
Broken girl with a crack in her skull
Pretty girl reduced to a porcelin doll
Broken girl finally coming out
Pretty girl now ceases to shout.
Broken girl has now prevailed
Pretty girl can only wail
Broken girl getting the help she needs
Pretty girl finally begins to receed.
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
Fake
Oh, people make their promises,
To listen to my plea's
But no one will ever realize,
What's aching inside of me
You all say I look different,
That I am getting far to thin ..
But it's not because I'm tired
And not because of "him"
My body feels so weak,
From fingers down my throat
Some days i wish i could stop,
I thought i would be able to cope
..but
I'll put on my loving smile,
When you ask me how i am
And I'll tell you i am great!
And lie as much as i can
This is my hidden agenda,
My everlasting pain
No matter how much i try
My life will never be the same
Prince Charming's Confessions
Perspiring greatly, growing with fever
Breathing so gently, yet chills will not leave her
Humming so softly, yet heart's beating fast
Crying and praying for time to go past
Desperate and hopeless, so lost in despair
Praying and wishing her prince would be there
Utterly misleading was each given lie
Where did she wake up, who was he and why?
Chained to a long bed, atop a dirty sheet
Another lost victim of crime and deceit
Tossing and turning, though she sees no escape
Where was prince charming, why is he so late
A blinding fluorescent fills up the shack
Now everything's visible, all that was black
Shaking and screaming as he comes to view
Relieved, she is crying: "I thought it was you!"
Grinning and moving, he hushes her lips
Prince charming comes up to give her a kiss
But now she's still shaking, wishing to go
His finger touch her breasts, tender, so slow
Squirming uneasily, a few nervous laughs
Pain fills up her throat and crawls down her back
Knowing the truth now, her lips wouldn't speak
He gripped her arms tightly, suddenly she's weak
His knife was gleaming, he gaped at her pose
Cutting through roughly; her body exposed
Feeling so naked, as her clothes hit the ground
The princess can't move. She can't make a sound
Choking on vomit, she cries in regret
The sheets are so sticky, beneath they are wet
On top of her body, her pride and her life
Prince charming looks happy, so filled with delight
She looks in his eyes with one dying plea
"Of all of the people, why was it me?"
Ignoring her wailing, he rips up her soul
The prince was so powerful. He was in control
Suffering last moments, struggling to live
She gave up her hoping, with nothing to give
She stared into his eyes, praying to understand
As the knife plunged her heart; the one in his hand
Vast amounts of pain began to spasm through
Whispering the same words, she died hearing the truth:
"I told you before sweetie, but you weren't convinced...
Because you were my princess...And I, your prince"
Breathing so gently, yet chills will not leave her
Humming so softly, yet heart's beating fast
Crying and praying for time to go past
Desperate and hopeless, so lost in despair
Praying and wishing her prince would be there
Utterly misleading was each given lie
Where did she wake up, who was he and why?
Chained to a long bed, atop a dirty sheet
Another lost victim of crime and deceit
Tossing and turning, though she sees no escape
Where was prince charming, why is he so late
A blinding fluorescent fills up the shack
Now everything's visible, all that was black
Shaking and screaming as he comes to view
Relieved, she is crying: "I thought it was you!"
Grinning and moving, he hushes her lips
Prince charming comes up to give her a kiss
But now she's still shaking, wishing to go
His finger touch her breasts, tender, so slow
Squirming uneasily, a few nervous laughs
Pain fills up her throat and crawls down her back
Knowing the truth now, her lips wouldn't speak
He gripped her arms tightly, suddenly she's weak
His knife was gleaming, he gaped at her pose
Cutting through roughly; her body exposed
Feeling so naked, as her clothes hit the ground
The princess can't move. She can't make a sound
Choking on vomit, she cries in regret
The sheets are so sticky, beneath they are wet
On top of her body, her pride and her life
Prince charming looks happy, so filled with delight
She looks in his eyes with one dying plea
"Of all of the people, why was it me?"
Ignoring her wailing, he rips up her soul
The prince was so powerful. He was in control
Suffering last moments, struggling to live
She gave up her hoping, with nothing to give
She stared into his eyes, praying to understand
As the knife plunged her heart; the one in his hand
Vast amounts of pain began to spasm through
Whispering the same words, she died hearing the truth:
"I told you before sweetie, but you weren't convinced...
Because you were my princess...And I, your prince"
Bleeding Mascara
A Tear of pain fills up her most beautiful eyes,
Shimmering in the dark behind her own disguise.
Thoughts are racing as if there is no tomorrow,
Last minute plans to destroy all of her sorrow.
Bleeding mascara is all that she's prone to,
After all of the things you put her through.
Her lips are shaking from the words that she can't say,
With smeared lipstick on her face that won't wash away.
Screeching voices that are deafening her weak ears,
Dragging her right along to her own pool of fears.
Empty bottles lay across her tiled bathroom floor,
As she stumbles down the hallway to find some more.
Trying to numb the pain of her exploded heart,
The very same heart that you tore apart.
Tasting death as if it's an antidote drug that heals,
Anything to help her escape the pain that she feels.
Singing a sweet lullaby to send her off to sleep,
Now that the pain you have caused has sunken too deep.
Bleeding mascara is all that she's prone to,
After all of the things you put her through.
Shimmering in the dark behind her own disguise.
Thoughts are racing as if there is no tomorrow,
Last minute plans to destroy all of her sorrow.
Bleeding mascara is all that she's prone to,
After all of the things you put her through.
Her lips are shaking from the words that she can't say,
With smeared lipstick on her face that won't wash away.
Screeching voices that are deafening her weak ears,
Dragging her right along to her own pool of fears.
Empty bottles lay across her tiled bathroom floor,
As she stumbles down the hallway to find some more.
Trying to numb the pain of her exploded heart,
The very same heart that you tore apart.
Tasting death as if it's an antidote drug that heals,
Anything to help her escape the pain that she feels.
Singing a sweet lullaby to send her off to sleep,
Now that the pain you have caused has sunken too deep.
Bleeding mascara is all that she's prone to,
After all of the things you put her through.
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