my soul speaks: September 2011

It was another rainy day far back in December
A night I will not forget, a day I will remember
The tears were falling hard down from the sky
It was a day I won’t forget because I met a guy
He began talking to me looked like a nice friend
It was a day I won’t forget because it had no end
As I waited for the bus he put his coat around me
I wanted to speak but it was hard to hear or see

I was startled by his kindness, how his eyes were blue
I fell in love with him instantly, a thing I never knew
He had many interests, and to me he said them all
It was a day I won’t forget, the beginning of my fall
He lent me his phone number, and quickly I did agree
I wanted to know him, there was so much more to see

Many days went by and we talked a lot every day
I would meet him at the bus with many things to say
My parents wouldn’t like him for he was older than I
A fifteen year old seeing a Twenty-four year old guy…

But still it didn’t matter; we were in love for sure
We would meet every day, going back for more
One night I told my parents, that I was sleeping out
And they wanted to know what it was all about
I told them a friend was inviting me for the night
Hesitantly they agreed and I bid them all goodnight

He picked me up at the corner, in a big red car
I waited while he ran an errand and went into a bar
I waited for an hour or two, possibly even more
Suddenly I had a feeling someone was at the door
My heart was beating fast, I needed to run inside
Nothing was working right, so finally I cried

Suddenly something woke me from my upset state
He came in the car saying “So sorry that I was late”
I hugged him and he then kissed me on the cheek
Adrenaline flew through me, I became very weak
He then whispered in my ear “Baby lets have fun,
“I will tie you down, you won’t move till I’m done”
Fate was hitting me hard; I knew that it was wrong
I managed to squeak a “No!” but he was really strong
He tied me down and stripped off all of my clothes
I couldn’t believe that all this was right under my nose

Then the door opened, and two other men came in
“Finally you brought her, let this game begin”
I was confused and hurt, stuck in a huge mess
My love now turned into hate, I had to confess
“Please let me go home, I will never bother you again”
“Sorry babe we need you, remember we are friends?”

I screamed so loud it seemed as if the world was deaf
I cried my tears begging them, till there was nothing left
No body gave in to me, or even heard all of my cries
I couldn’t believe everything we were, all became lies

I couldn’t hear a thing, except their laughs of pleasure
A body once so innocent, and now they have my treasure
I don’t know what I was thinking, nothing made sense
I tried to remember all my classes to help in my defense
This all was my fault, as they were pushing me inside
And this poem will not measure how much I nearly cried

Finally they were finished, and they pushed me out the car
My legs were dripping blood, my arms had many scars
“Playing with you was fun; you fell for my good old trick”
Another one told me thank you for rubbing on his dick

I began to run really fast, for I just needed to get away
I thought of my parents and what they would really say
I fooled everyone in the game, especially my own self
Never thinking about others, or how they would have felt
I was selfish and stupid, fifteen, I couldn’t ever understand
All I needed right now was for someone to hold my hand
I fell on to the floor, without any notice of where I was
My body became limp and cold, my actions were the cause
It was a night I won’t forget, one I always will remember
The moment that changed my life, a cold night in December
So drown in all your sorrow
Let it wash the pain away
There is no other escape
You're alone
You're hurt
And no one will save you this time...
But... who would want to anyway?

my soul speaks

Thursday, September 15, 2011

A Cold Night In December

The Broken Pretty Girl